A long holiday weekend is headed our way. Are you headed to the shore or to a sure thing at your local movie theater, where your travels may take you to horrifying places (from the safety of your seat) and you’ll learn, Don’t Breathe too loudly (or you’ll miss all that creepy action). A quick stopover to Japan, without all that bumper-to-bumper traffic, may be more to your liking, as Kubo and the Two Strings promises to pull at your heartstrings, or at least make you glad you don’t have to travel too far for family reunions. Morgan is hoping to tug at a few artificially-created heartstrings, as the humanoid brings her brand of hair-raising horror to our corner of the world.
Perhaps you’d rather play it safe as a non-menu-item guest at the Sausage Party, much to the delight of the non-vegetarians among us. Maybe arms dealers will pique your interest, as the War Dogs, in their unique way, fight the dog-eat-dog battle of the box office. There’s also assassin Mechanic: Resurrection, who promises to breathe new life into that sleepy end-of-summer season. Still hanging on are those battling members of the Suicide Squad, who do not promise to go gently into that good night, seeing as how they really are no good.
Also up to no good is the evil entity hounding those Yoga Hosers, who are just looking for a little serenity to go with their cinema. Of course, by the serene shoreline, you may discover The Light Between Oceans, where heartache and a truly pretty ocean view, waits.
What will be waiting for you at your local movie theater this long holiday weekend?
Audiences were screaming Don’t Breathe to their seatmates at movie theaters this weekend, as horror invaded their sensitive hearts (while inhibiting their breathing abilities). The always-insensitive Suicide Squad maintained the death wish they extended to their competition as they continued to survive the end-of-summer crowd. Kubo and the Two Strings were weaving a sweet thread around gentle hearts, giving double meaning to family values while the eat-or-be-eaten guests at the Sausage Party were still well represented (if not well fed). Back for more, Mechanic: Resurrection played a part in reviving an assassin while revitalizing our movie-going experience.
It was a stimulating weekend at the movies, with horror and horrible characters going head-to-head, family front and center, with animation and assassins in an odd competition, all culminating in one cool party!
Which of our oddly delightful stories were you celebrating this weekend?
Estimated Domestic Box Office Totals:
- Don’t Breathe $26.1 million.
- Suicide Squad $12.1 million.
- Kubo and the Two Strings $7.8 million.
- Sausage Party $7.7 million.
- Mechanic: Resurrection $7.5 million.
Although Ben-Hur was born for the big screen, his less-than-stellar opening weekend suggests he will soon be riding his chariot into the cinematic sunset. Will the prince be made a box-office pauper? Might the sun dare to set on the un-princely Suicide Squad, killing their dream of eternally obliterating their less-lethal competition? What about the hungry guests at that strange Sausage Party? Will they be satisfied with a meaty story but a meatless existence? Can those supermarket items make the ultimate break from their weighty opposition or will the War Dogs, badasses that they are, take the biggest bite out of the all-important movie database? With a terrifying heist taking place by another group of really bad guys, will moviegoers declare, Don’t Breathe for fear of missing a horrific moment?
In the mood for a bloody kind of battle? Hands of Stone promises one handy as opposed to horrifying event. Fighting a different kind of war, familial matters take center stage, offering Kubo and the Two Strings all they need to tie together one big happy family reunion.
Before any happy reunions can take place, the Mechanic: Resurrection takes a trip around the globe, sure to revitalize and repair what ails the average, action-seeking audience.
Which of our revitalizing tales will you be checking out this weekend?
The Suicide Squad remained on their deadly mission to dominate anyone who crossed their suicidal path, once again putting a damper on the Sausage Party, which still managed to satisfy moviegoers with an appetite for adult-animated fare. Those action-oriented War Dogs were fighting their own kind of crusade, leading their audience through one bizarre box-office battle. Kubo and the Two Strings offered two times the action, bonding moviegoers to his animated plight. Ben-Hur hitched a (chariot) ride on the road to redemption (as opposed to success), meeting the most interesting characters on his scenic, cinematic journey.
A classic was cleverly retold this weekend, Japan proved to be a nice place to visit (despite that evil spirit), suicidal maniacs and supermarket meals were crossing paths in the craziest way while arms dealers were lending a helping hand (mostly to themselves).
Which of our classics-in-the-making had a hand in making your weekend unforgettable?
Estimated Domestic Box Office Totals:
- Suicide Squad $20.7million.
- Sausage Party $15.3million.
- War Dogs $14.3 million.
- Kubo and the Two Strings $12.6 million.
- Ben-Hur $11.4 million.
Ready for a chariot ride leading to the most amazing stars? Ben-Hur sure is, although he’s mighty steamed about that whole false treason accusation thingy. Know who else is madder than Moses? Well, that would be the Suicide Squad, who did not appreciate those tepid reviews or the worthy competition nipping at their heels looking to cash in on their hefty box-office haul. Does anyone wanna make those guys angry? Then there’s the confused guest attending the Sausage Party, who really didn’t appreciate being a part of the menu. Too bad they didn’t read that all-important fine print, which clearly stated they would be eaten as part of the entertainment. Next up, new-in-town War Dogs certainly have their conflicts to contend with. Will they win that war? Tuning into the war within his damaged psyche Jason Bourne continues reconciling his sordid past with his equally-sordid presence. Will it bring him peace, at least until his next action-packed go around?
What exactly is going on around Pete’s Dragon? Will an orphan’s best friend provide a family-friendly tale sure to satisfy movie lovers of all ages? Might those Bad Moms offer the best medicine for the end-of-summer-blockbusters blues? Maybe Kubo and the Two Strings will peacefully tie it all together (after dealing with that unfortunate vengeful apparition).
Revenge may have been on many (too many, really) of our complicated characters’ minds, but redemption fortunately plays an ultimate part in some of their sorted, storied journeys.
Which of our complicated stories will play a part in your weekend?
The Suicide Squad remained the deadly team not to tamper with, as moviegoers once again flocked to the crew with the crazy death wish. Looking for an escape from their imminent demise, The Sausage Party provided the link to adult-animated entertainment with the most festive fare. Audiences seeking a sweeter mission found Pete’s Dragon offered a delicious, G-rated feast for a much younger crowd (who weren’t ready to witness the R- rated meat merrymaking found in the aforementioned tale). Following the link to the coolest part of movie town, Jason Bourne remained in the business of saving lives as opposed to salvaging those who cross his heroic path. Heroes in their own minds, Bad Moms were still showing moviegoers a good time (provided they left the kids at home, of course).
A good party was held in movie theaters coast to coast this weekend, with the main menu consisting of talking cuisine, criminals, crusaders, a couple of crazy moms and one cool dragon sure to satisfy and liven up an oddly imaginative weekend.
Which of our crazy cool tales livened up your weekend?
Estimated Domestic Box Office Results:
1 Suicide Squad $43.8 million.
2. Sausage Party $33.6 million.
3. Pete’s Dragon $21.5 million.
4. Jason Bourne $13.6 million.
5. Bad Moms $11.5 million.
Summer is really heating up, as hot new contenders enter the movie arena, guaranteeing merrymaking that only the movie kingdom can accomplish.
The Sausage Party, while confusing for its guests, is sure to offer an odd but amusing film fare (as long as you’re not on the menu). Pete’s Dragon, always hungry for colorful stories, promises to tell the tallest of family-friendly tales (unlike the aforementioned food festivities). Then there’s the musically-challenged Florence Foster Jenkins. What she lacks in talent she most certainly makes up for in, umm, enthusiasm. Does she have what it takes to squash those enthusiastic but talentless members of the critically panned Suicide Squad? Can Meryl take down that mad machine? With this much competition, can Jason Bourne save himself from all that killer entertainment? Is he too tame in comparison to a squad with a weird death wish?
As an entertaining summer sails on, will a Star Trek Beyond your typical blockbuster experience be achieved before an award-worthy autumn? Trekking through their own child-free zone, can those Bad Moms, who aren’t winning any awards, ever turn good? Perhaps we need to take the good with the bad and look for the answers courtesy of The Secret Life of Pets, where our once-mute friends have corned the market on “intellectual” conversation.
Which of our oddly intellectual characters will you be spending time with this weekend?